Wednesday, March 10, 2010

The 22 makes his way to ERAC...then gets caught up on his shots

The Double Deuce has once again resurfaced…and it seems appropriate that it would be after visiting jail...this time it found its way to the Eagle Rock Rugby Club’s brand new clubhouse. For those of us that have played rugby in Southern California for any length of time, we know that a private clubhouse is very rare. Several teams have very nice fields, OMBAC, Back Bay and SLO’s river bottom pitch are certainly among the top, but not even those teams have a fully functioning bar, with plenty of room for drinking, watching TV, eating and for some…smoking chronic.


Apparently, there was some old crazy person who built a ton of shit in Burbank. He made a pseudo office building/apartment/bar and designed it too look like, what can only be described as a poor mans version of a poor mans castle. Anyway, it is a weird one-bedroom bar with a shower only Caligula would love. Enough about the digs…it was a fun after party…better because we won, and if you imbibe on the pipe, probably even better. But, you would have to spend a lot of time with ERAC players to do so…not sure if it is worth it in the end.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Why is the Double Deuce so awesome?

Well, Twenty-two is an even composite number, its proper divisors being 1, 2 and 11. 22 is the sixth discrete semiprime and the fourth in the (2.q) family. With 21 it forms the second discrete semiprime pair. 22 has an aliquot sum of 14 and is the fifth composite number found in the 7-aliquot tree. It has a 7- member aliquot sequence 22, 14, 10, 8, 7, 1, 0 of which the next two members are themselves discrete semiprimes, 22 is the first discrete semiprime exhibiting this property. 169 also has 14 as its aliquot sum. 22 is itself the aliquot sum of two numbers 20, 38. Obviously, it is the atomic number of titanium

It is imporatnt number in many religions...except Scientology..whcing is probably not a religion.

  • There are 22 letters in the Hebrew alphabet
  • There are 22 chapters of the Revelation of John in the Bible
  • In the Kabbalah, there are 22 paths between the sephiroth
  • Psalm 22 (22nd in the Book of Psalm in the King James Bible), described by the New American Standard Bible as the "A Cry of Anguish and a Song of Praise", is the Psalm to which the crucified and dying Jesus makes reference, citing its first verse in Aramaic (Matthew 27:46; Mark 15:34)
  • Psalm 118 verse 22 contains all 22 letters of the Hebrew alphabet and is dead center of the Bible. "The stone (Jesus) the builders (Jews) rejected has become the chief cornerstoneBible
In sport, 22 has some interesting significance

22 is the jersey number of Mark Ingram, running back from Alabama, who won the Heisman trophy as a sophomore in 2009. He was the first ever Heisman trophy winner for the Crimson Tide. Also, he received this award the same year Alabama won it's 22nd SEC title.



22 is the number of [Phillip Hughes] who playes for Australia, NSW and Sussex in cricket

  
In rugby union, the "22" is a the line in each half of the field which is 22 metres from the respective try line. It has significance in a number of laws particularly relating to kicking the ball away.


22 is the number of players on the field in a Football (soccer) match, and also the number of players on the field at any one time in an American football match.


The jersey number 22 has been retired for NBA players Clyde Drexler, Elgin Baylor and Dave DeBusschere. The number was also worn by Rolando Blackman, Michael Redd, John Salley, among others. It was also the number worn in high school by Sarah Palin.

The length of a cricket pitch is 22 yards.


In Australian rules football there are 22 players on each team, comprising a starting 18, and 4 bench players.


"22" is a common name for the .22 calibre .22 Long Rifle cartridge.


NFL All-time leading rusher Emmitt Smith of the Dallas Cowboys wore the number 22.


In Lacrosse the number 22 is given yearly to the most anticipated player on the Syracuse lacrosse team, notable people that have worn the number 22 have been, Gary Gait, Casey Powell, Mike Powell,and Ryan Powell


"22" is the number of the Bill Davis Racing Toyota driven by Dave Blaney


"22" is worn by the former USA field hockey Women's National Team captain Kate "Tiki" Barber.


"22" is worn by Manchester United player, John O'Shea, the only player in club history to have played all 11 positions.


"22" is worn by the AC Milan and Brazil Player of the year (2007),Kaka


"22" was the number of Lewis Hamilton's McLaren-Mercedes in 2008 and is the number of Jenson Button's Brawn-Mercedes in 2009, both winning the drivers' championship that year.


"22" wears the Arsenal FC player, left back Gael Clichy.


"22" The number of points between the F2 Championship 2009 Leader and the second place (expected to increase in the forthcoming races).

"22" is the number worn by the cornerback Tracy Porter for the New Orleans Saints. Porter intercepted Peyton Manning for a touchdown and ended hopes of a comeback in Super Bowl XLIV


 Lastly, and most improtantly...In the year 22 AD the Red Eyebrows defeated the main Chinese imperial army at Liang.

The Double Deuce




 



22 finds love after prison.

No words can describe this


The Doubel Deuce

Trouble for 22

Drunken rugby team arrested after female player run over by two-ton Prop as she slept in tent
By The Doube Deuce
Los Angeles March 3, 2010

A woman rugby player is lucky to be alive after drunken yobs pushed a two-ton prop into her tent as she slept, fracturing her skull, kinking her weave and hurting her feelings.


The 'prank' also left Lucy Splitlip with facial injuries after she was crushed by the huge wad-of-chewing-gum man, which was rolled down a hill.


The 26-year-old had been camping at the All Nic-Names Rugby Club, near Orange County where she was due to play in a competition.


Lucy Splitlip was hit by the large prop as she slept



The 5ft-wide, beer bellied prop careened into her tent at 1am on Saturday, narrowly missing two friends.


She was taken to a local hospital before being airlifted 75 miles to the specialist neurology unit at OhSnap Memorial Goodtimes Hospital.


After she was discharged last night, she said: 'I guess heard him coming, but I just thought he was breathing heavy. There was like a lot of banging and then I heard people laughing.


'I stopped his gunt with my face. My face was numb so I couldn't feel much. I have had a lucky escape…these black eyes didn’t just happen spontaniously you know.'



Police arrested 21 members of a Team that claims all their jerseys were recently lost. Police arrested Little Hos, Dirty Sanchez, Pudding Shooter, and a host of other players only able to respond to nic-names. They have all been released on bail, with the exception of a young man who is only referred to as, The Double Deuce.



Number 22 was found to be the mastermind of the prank. "Hell, all I had to do was throw a ding dong down the hill and gravity took over. I can't be held responsible...did I ever tell you about the time I scored 6 tries against the Armada...it was awesome"

Miss Split Lip's team, the Puntcunt Falcons, were camping in a field by the club, where they were due to play in the annual Festival of Sevens or Eights, Whatever We Have Rugby Tournament.

One witness said yesterday: 'Emma and her friends had gone to bed. I saw some strap ons and possibly a rocket propelled vibrator...normal rugby stuff."

'There were three of them in the tent when lads from a visiting club thought it would be fun to set the prop free. 'It was on the top of a slight hill and they pushed it to get it going, knowing there were people camping in its path.

Police are refusing to comment on what happened to the prop. Witnesses say they still saw him rolling near Norco. As for Double Deuce, police claim that when he was returned to his cell, he turned to the officer and yelled, "How does every good rugby song end...duh duh da dunt dunt dunt...tits! and he disappeared.

Ricardo Montalban contributed to this article.


22's first Trip

From the diary of 22 (found in his holding cell)

Today, I learned from my captors that I am going to go on a trip. Truth be told, I want to go on as many trips as possible with my captures. Mainly because, as a Bucks Jersey, I don’t go to that many cool places. Sure, San Diego is nice and Vegas is always cool, but Beaumont…they take me to Beaumont way too much. And then I found out my first trip with the PRFC would be on a charter bus…well if I had a urethra, I would have peed myself. At first I thought I was gonna drive, because they put me on the driver of this bus. He didn’t speak much English, so I am pretty sure he was confused as to why I was being draped on him with cheers from the bus.

The trip up was good…we watched The Hangover and I heard this guy talking about how awesome it was “back in the day” and “when I first started playing rugby...” Seriously, that is all he said? The fucker must have ADD…I wanted to know about the past of PRFC. There was also quite a bit of talk about some “douche” (possibly a French word…not familiar with it’s origin?) I think this douche is a liquid to make a girls vag smell better. this particular douce came in "Kai flavor" or something…it is still quite confusing to me. The bucks limit their conversations to “hand jobs,” “Jell-o” and “Pumas” (both big and little.)

Anyway, the boys from PRFC won the game, stood around a parking lot eating massive quantities of meat and drinking beer. I figured we would watch the Hurt Locker or Precious on the way back, someone (same guy who wouldn’t finish a story about Pasadena Lore) kept screaming “ASIAN PORN…ASIAN PORN!” Well, that is all I am gonna say about that. I’ve got to be honest with you… there was a lot very, VERY weird things that happened on that trip.

One of the weirdest things was at the rest stop. I met a very nice man who seemed to be living in his car (not sure why he had aluminum foil on his windows though) with his very nice dog. I blacked out from terror and the smell of ripple, but the video has helped me “remember” what happened next.

Upon arriving home (jammed into a smelly bag as I am sure the cops are on the look out for me) I recall someone talking about “no one was puking this time.” I’m not sure if this was a good or bad thing though.

Hopefully the following weeks are not as eventful.

The Double Deuce